After the Rain, A Thousand Tomorrows

On ASEAN Summit 2025, I watch, observe and this is my view. I don’t like every political figure who steps on our soil. Some of them carry histories, decisions, and actions that I personally disagree with. But when I watched the diplomatic welcome given to certain leaders at the ASEAN Summit, a part of me was reminded of something simpler than geopolitics: Not every handshake is approval, sometimes it is protection. Malaysia is not a superpower. I do understand that Malaysia as a country, we do not have the luxury to act like one. Our leaders carry responsibilities that are bigger than the emotions of one day… and the consequences of a single gesture can spill over to millions of lives, beyond our borders and region. It is easy to demand “firm action” from behind a screen. It is easy to feel angry watching what looks like friendliness. It is easy to say “do more,” when we are not the ones who will absorb the impact. Diplomacy often looks like compromise from the outside, but...

Some nights, I still hear it — his heartbeat. Not in a dream, not in memory, just there. Like a soft echo inside my chest. It’s strange how the body remembers what the mind tries to let go. That calm rhythm — the one that used to steady me when everything else fell apart. I don’t chase that feeling anymore. It just comes when it wants to — like he’s checking in quietly, reminding me that love doesn’t end, it just shifts shape. Maybe that’s why I still feel him in the stillness of the night, in the sound of my own breathing, in every quiet moment that doesn’t ask for words. He’s not here, but the heartbeat he left behind — still beats for him. 15th Oct 2025

October in Kelantan year 2020 The sky was bright, the street alive with colours — umbrellas dancing above our heads, just like how our laughter filled the air that day. It wasn’t a fancy trip, but it was ours. We had our little suitcase, our simple plans, and that easy comfort of knowing we had each other. You were calm, steady, always making sure I was okay. I didn’t know then that this photo would become one of my most precious memories. Now, five years later, when I look at it, I no longer break. I breathe. I smile. Because this picture isn’t just a memory — it’s proof that I once loved deeply and was loved just the same. And today, that thought brings me peace. Still side by side. Still love. Always love.

Bahagian Saya 8 October 2025 Hi Sayangku, Didoakan Sayang dalam rahmah Allah sentiasa. Saya baru sampai rumah. Balik kerja singgah jap kedai Kak Faridah, order Nescafe ais — craving since morning. Masa nak bayar tu, Kak Faridah pandang saya pelik sikit. Dia cakap, “Kuat awak.” Saya senyum je, tapi Sayang tahu kan… hati ni terus rasa berat. Saya jawab, “Bahagian saya, Kak.” Dia senyum balik, tapi lepas tu dia tanya, “Tak nak cari pengganti?” Sayang, laju saya istighfar. It’s not even a year. Saya cakap, “Astaghfirullah Kak, jangan… belum lagi.” Tapi dia teruskan, katanya ada orang tanya — “Isteri Mat Nor tu...” Sayang, I froze. Macam mana dia tahu? Siap tanya saya ada anak ke tak. Amboi betul. I just smiled and said, “Eh Kak, belum setahun Kak… saya tak boleh kata tak mungkin sebab masa depan Allah je tahu, tapi untuk sekarang, belum lagi.” Kak Faridah cepat-cepat minta maaf. Dia cakap dia pun dah bagitahu orang tu, dia tak berani nak usik hal tu. Tapi Sayang… it felt weird hearing your...

Here there I am heard news about Global Sumud Flotilla (GSF). I admire them. Brave. Not easy to do it. But here in my country we have so many mixed reaction in social media. It made me smile, reading comments about fans banning their K-pop idols for staying silent on Palestine. Some forget — idols are part of a business machine. They speak when contracts allow. When they become ambassadors, they’re doing a job, not leading a movement. Let’s not romanticize the industry. Behind the glitter are strict image controls, brand deals, and global politics. Speaking out isn’t just risky — it’s career suicide in that world. That’s why I don’t rely on them. Real change starts with us. Ordinary people. The ones who donate, speak, educate, and act. The ones who don’t need celebrity permission to care. I support the movement to break the siege — because they’ve done what many thought impossible. They made the world look. They got attention. And that’s the first step to accountability. I welcome and ...